Sunday, December 13, 2015

My Beloved...


My beloved is the bedrock beneath my feet,
Solid and steadfast, he makes my steps secure
that I may walk my path with surety

My beloved is the mighty oak,
that I may lean upon and rest when I am weak or weary. a stalwart support 
that I may stand in strength


My beloved is the bright star in the dark sky
when I wander in the night his light guides me
 that I may find my way

My beloved is the glowing coals of the hearth
And the need-fire in the winter’s night
And the torch that lights the hall
That I may know warmth and safety

And when I wake before the dawn
in that space before waking, before daylight
my beloved’s voice in my mind,
the memory of his scent
the thought of his touch.
 my passion for him makes me glow
with desire and will
and fills me with purpose
that I might rise and face the world with power... 

Monday, August 3, 2015

Earth; an invocation...

The Stones around us and beneath our feet,
The Trees; roots, trunks and branches,
The soil we plant, the ore we mine,
Tools of iron, steel, copper and clay,
Swords, hammers and plows,
The things we build, the houses we live in,
The clothes we wear, leather, wool, and silk,
The work we do, the money we earn,
The food we eat, meat, milk, fruit and bread,
A million shades of green, gold and brown,
Our arms, our legs, our shoulders and backs,
Bone, muscle and skin,
The body, the belly, the womb,
The drum and the dance,
The sex through which all life continues,
And the Grave,

Welcome Earth…

Sunday, April 12, 2015

Going to Ground


my body betrayed me…
balance an elusive sprite…
smoke, rain and fresh cool wind danced in erratic ecstasy…
panic blossomed within my belly…
I went to ground.

I knelt upon the Mother,
my hands in Her dark soil…
 sent roots into Her depths,
entwined them around strong solid stone.
laid my body down upon Her,
touched Her creatures,
and waited. 

Shadow rose up within me,
memories of long ago…
long forgotten conflict…
doubts of my place in the world…
of my purpose.

Thoughts of going to ground…
of returning to the Mother to be safe
 in the nurturing depths of Her dark soil…
desire to retreat to Her solidity and strength.

But I am a child of the Void…
the Void harbors no hiding places…
only potential…
and chaotic power
waiting to be given form…

so I shall learn to dance on ecstasy  
to follow sprites into wildeness…
to hold strength of Earth within my body

and to walk my path with what grace I can…

Wednesday, March 18, 2015

good enough...

“You have a certain laugh when you are uncomfortable, when you are uneasy, when you are nervous, anxious, feeling vulnerable and trying not to let it show."

A beloved let me cry when my lover left, he tells me this to explain why he knows I am not all right, as I have tried to convince myself that I am…that I will be…

As I offer up the lie to him, like offerings to my Gods, 
like blackberries in a bowl on the breakfast table…

to let him out of this spiral before I panic and pull him under with me, 
like a drowning man grasping at anything to stay above water…

I have a tell…gotta fix that…

My brain begins the litany…

"Useless…”

“No good to anyone…”

The realization that no one has ever fallen in love with me…ever…

“Of course they didn’t...how could they?”

“What is wrong with me?”

“What is right…?”

The shadows smell blood in the water…too late now…

“Have I done anything right?...ever?”

“Yes, twice…”

“Is that enough?”

“maybe…”

Can I remember that I am good enough?

Can I convince myself that this feeling is simply my heart expanding, learning, growing,
increasing its capacity…?

maybe…

Can I breathe? Can I breathe deeper, slower?…

Can I remember that love is a gift I am capable of?

That I am capable?
That I am good enough?
That I can do this?
That I am strong?
That I am whole?
That it will be all right?
That this will pass?
That I will survive this?
That this is necessary?

“maybe…”

I still cannot remember anyone ever falling in love with me, and that is all right…
because I can remember falling in love...and that is good enough.

Sunday, December 28, 2014

Blooming...

What is this flower blooming,
opening inside of me?
Each velvet petal unfolding,
each unfolding and opening,
one by one,
exposing the velvet color
of the space inside.
Trying to open enough,
to empty itself,
to make enough space,
so you will stay,
and fill it with your scent,
and the sound of your breathing,
your laughter and your voice,
with the warmth of your body,
and the smiles you give when I have pleased you.
Each layer unfolding outward,
exposing the space made empty,
the space you occupy,
the space you leave behind.

Tuesday, December 23, 2014

Oh Holy Night revised

Oh Holy Night…revised to reflect my hope for this world…

Oh Holy night, the stars are brightly shining,
Is this the night Love’s Light shall return?
Long lay the world in grief and darkness pining,
Til Light appears and the soul knows its worth.

A thrill of hope, the weary world rejoices,
For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn’
Fall on your knees, Oh hear the voices singing,
Oh night Divine, Oh night of Light’s return,
Oh night Divine, Oh night, Oh night Divine.

May we learn to love one another,
The Light is Love and its child is Peace.
Chains shall break for the slave is our brother,
And in Love’s name all oppression shall cease.

Sweet hymns of joy in grateful chorus raise we,
May all among us learn to live in peace,
Love is the Law; Oh may it reign forever,
Oh night Divine, Oh night of Light’s return,
Oh night Divine, Oh night, Oh night Divine.

Wednesday, November 19, 2014

Sacraments

Cooking is a sacred act.

I have not cooked for anyone in years.

I have been a woman excommunicated,

exiled from my own humanity.

No one breaks bread at this table, 

no one sleeps in this bed,

no one wakes to roses,

and the scent of cinnamon,

and blackberries 

in a bowl on the kitchen table.

No one showers while I drink coffee on Sunday morning.


This body, my body,

is broken like bread,

is made holy by your hands,

is made sacred with your mouth.

Your lips, my sacraments,

like the berries in the bowl,

fill my mouth with the divine.


Your breath warms me,

like the breath of God,

breathing life into this body.

Your hands bless me,

your touch makes me human,

makes me woman,

restores me to communion,

with God.