Friday, January 24, 2014

Falling into the fire...

I had a dream…
You were there, offering me all that I had once desired…
Offering me the chance to fall …
back into all the old patterns and habits of my past.
Offering me the opportunity to return to the veil,
that hides me from myself and from the light.
I woke knowing that I could not have you,
or risk returning to the shadows.

I told myself   “Do not fall in love with him.
He is too strong for you.
You will lose yourself again.
Do not fall in love with him.”
But it was already far too late…

I fell, Oh how I fell…
And I am falling still…
It matters not that you are not in love with me…
or that you cannot be.
It makes no difference that I am strong enough without you,
Or with you, or that I am not with you.
or that you wear the face of God, or that He wears yours.
I no longer know which, and it no longer matters.

For I am strong enough to love a God…
and to stand in the light.
I no longer need to hide behind the veil…
I can stand and fall and fall and fall…
And still I stand…

I stand in the light no matter how I fall…
The falling is no longer to be feared…
The fire inside your mind, your heart, your soul…
Sparks the flame within my own
Your body sets my own on fire
And so I fall …

into the magick of falling
in love with you…
and I stand in the light of the fire...
even as I fall…

Tuesday, December 24, 2013


Sleeping deep within the Mother
You walk the dream-time
Traveling the star-road
Through the void
In the forest of the otherworlds
Wisdom-stones beneath your feet
In silence and power
Instinct mingles with intuition
Finding truth and emerging into new light


Your shadow passes silently over me,
hiding me from the light and warmth of the sun.
I shiver and glow with the colour of my passion for you.
Until the dark and shifting clouds hide you from me
and I fear I shall never see you again.
Terrified and cold.
Then you leave me and pass by.
And I am bright again,
if not so warm.

Tuesday, December 10, 2013

I lay upon my bed...

I lay upon my bed,
The light turned out an hour ago,
The embers shimmer and glow inside,
The waves rolling off my skin,
Light the shadows all around.

I think of you and in my mind,
I hold your body close.

Although my heart would be for you,
A place of love and healing,
My mind tells me that what you need,
Is not what I can offer.

I focus on your pain,
On my desire to transform
That sharp thing,
Into something else.

As intense and overwhelming,
And consuming as my need.

My body and my soul want you still,
Even in your darkest hour.

To feel your force,
Your frustration and your anger,
Your loss and grief and despair,
Pouring into me,
Purged and purified.

To be battered in your arms,
To feel your violence and your hope,
To feel your control,
And your abandonment of it.

To feel your hands around my throat,
Pressed against the wall,
With no escape,
No choice,
But to surrender to your will,
And be conquered by your power.

Requium for our cat

Spirits of the other realm
Guide our most familiar friend
When his spirit shall return
May he find us once again
Bind us here to one another
Bind our sorrow and our grief
Bind us with our love together
Make our time of mourning brief
Merry meet and merry part and merry meet again
Lord and Lady Blessed be
To our most familiar friend.

Wishing Well Love Spell

I cast my wish into the Well,
And as I do I cast this spell.
I call to me my match, my mate.
I call the one who is my fate.
I call to me my own true love,
By Sun and Moon and Stars above!

Invocation to my Patron

Gwynn ap Nudd
Dark Father, Lord of the Storm
Leader of the Hunt, Guide of the Dead
Guardian of the Cauldron of Annwfn
I come to you in the Dark
I cry to you in the storm
Hear me and Lead me home
Gwynn ap Nudd
Rider of the winds, Lord of the Dark
At whose feet my ancestors sit
I call to you in my despair
I am your child, I am in need
Embrace me in my weakness,
my ugliness, my fear
hear me and lead me home