Highway...

I stand in the shadows under a dark sky,

watching the trucks and cars drive past from left to right,

a flat, straight highway going south. 

Their lights moving past at a constant speed,

I could be ten states away by morning.

Each moving farther and farther away from this place, 

already there are three hours behind me.

There is nothing to hold me here. 

I would be ten states away by morning.

Nothing but the pain I feel,

my anger and the desire

to cut you open and to see you hurt.

I would be ten states away by morning.

I rage at you,

for undoing my carefully built boxes,

and the locks I have kept in place for so long.

for breaking open this heart.

for making me feel.

I watch the lights go past,

I could be ten states away by morning.

I could catch a ride to anywhere,

away from the people who touch me,

away from the pain I will feel,

and live my life,

with this heart locked safely away.

I will be ten states away by morning.

and lock up the boxes,

and be free of this heart that insists on awakening.

I would be ten states away by morning.

but even now it fights me,

to feel the pain I know is coming,

to let you push me under,

and drown if that is what I must do.

I would be ten states away by morning,

but this heart binds me with its magick,

and my feet carry me back inside.